Friday, June 27, 2014

Would this be a problem for you?

So i'm sitting, chillin...plotting on how to take over the world when a guy friend of mine walks past. He doubles back and stops at my door and starts telling me about how his chick is mad at him AGAIN. Slightly amused, i asked, well- what did you do?

Turns out, him and his chick had been sitting down watching tv when all of a sudden a chick with a ample sized derriere appeared on the screen. Dude says aloud: Damn, shorty got a fat ass! He is then met with the stank eye coupled with the silent treatment. A silent treatment which was only briefly punctuated by the words: you clearly don't know whats ok to say to me.

Now...i just giggled. Because that wouldn't be a problem for me. Hell, i've been with significant others and seen a fat ass attached to another human being walk right past us and said damn babe, look at her ass! Ain't no thang to me. I've been with dudes who try to play it off like they ain't looking, and even verbally "confirm" that they are good with what they are walking with (i.e: me) and i'd still say 1) you lyin, 2) i don't care if you looking- im lookin too.

So my question is, and i guess its mostly to the womenfolk, would this be an issue for you? Would you genuinely be upset about your significant other checking out another woman's booty (or any other body part)?

Friday, June 20, 2014

The shot seen 'round the world

I saw this pretty early in the day yesterday (or maybe the day before, i don't remember):
felons can be cute too

But i never would have thought it would have blown up the way it did lol.

He is fine as hell tho. Just gorgeous. And for the life of me, idk why negros seems to have an issue with the fact that a slew of women, particularly of the black/brown variety, we willing to auction off imaginary children and sacrifice hypothetical freedoms to get a piece of it. Being a criminal might make you a less attractive life partner but the loins want what the loins want lol.

I personally prefer the other internet sensation of the moment:
got me rethinking my feelings about white ppl with dreads

Now this man is a delicious looking piece of man. Good heavens. And the body on dude...
pardon me as i wipe the drool from my chin

Tell me you wouldn't slap ya mama to lick the sweat off those abs! Oh, is it just me? Ok then. (._. )

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

I'm late

(not that kind of late) but i just saw the uncensored version of the Blurred Lines video and all i can say is:

What in the hell was the point?

It was literally 4 and a half minutes of titties floating around my computer screen. Seriously...what was the freaking point?

Aren't TI, Pharrell and Robin Thicke all married? Where are these people's wives? I wish my nigga would. SMH

This all just begs the question of why does anyone make these stupid uncensored videos in the first place? Okay, once upon a time, i imagine there was a certain shock value to it. And when BET was culturally relevant and still showing Uncut, then fine...i guess. But nowadays. What purpose does this foolywang serve? Its not like anyone is gonna see it outside of Youtube.

I will say though, one of those chicks had a seriously nice rack (though not much of anything else). If those boobs are hers by nature, good on you honey! Everybody ain't able.

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Beez in the trap

More like bees in the apartment. More specifically, my apartment. Don't ask me how it happened. I came home around 5. I didn't see the bee until like 10:30pm. So, the only thing that makes sense is that this bee was chillin in my crib...for over 5hrs...just sitting in the corner somewhere...waiting and plotting my demise.

One second i was sitting on my couch surfing facebook, the next i was being accosted by flying monsters in bee form.

I often talk about flipping tables or throwing laptops out of windows...but let me tell you, when i caught sight of this ginormous ass carpenter bee out the corner of my eye making its way rapidly in my direction...my laptop went FLYING! As did I! The fact that this laptop even works in the condition that is in, is nothing short of a blessing AND a miracle!

Somehow in the night, i lost sight of the bee. The last i saw, it flew into the overhead light fixture in my dining room. Yet somehow after some hours, when i finally worked up the balls to beat the life out of my light fixture with the broom, the bee was nowhere to be found.

By now it is nearly midnight. And i have things to do the next day. So i decide to barricade myself in my bedroom and tackle the issue again in the morning.

It has been two days now and i still have not been able to re-locate this bee. Hopefully it died and will no longer be an issue for me. But far more likely, i will take a nap and wake up with it sitting on my nose. (GOD FORBID!!!!)