Monday, April 29, 2013

Under The Cherry Moon

When i was younger, it seriously used to boggle my mind how old women (and by old women, i mean

anyone the same age as my mother) were so enamored with Prince. Like...couldn't they see he was gay? Why were they so gung ho to throw their granny panties at a man who walked about with a relaxer, high heel boots and assless pants (among other things)? And he wasn't even cute either. He was just a tiny, scrawny lil high-yellow thang. C'mon son.

My mom definitely spent the better part of my young adulthood trying to convince me that my lack of interest in Prince was...well foolishness lol. But i just was not buying it.

But recently...i don't know what in the world has happened. Maybe my eyes have been opened or my heart softened...idk. But let me tell you. I am definitely beginning to see Prince for the sexilicious lil thing he is! Good googa-mooga. Let Prince walk up on me. He doesn't even have to say anything. Just stand there and give me that Prince smirk. He won't have to worry about me throwing my panties at him cuz i'm pretty sure they'd just melt off my body.

Friday, April 26, 2013

When keeping it real goes wrong

And by keeping it real, i mean keeping it real SEXY

Can you imagine, being deported because you look too sexy? I mean...i guess in a country like Saudi Arabia it kinda makes sense, given about how women should behave and all. I can't front though...that Omar Borkan Al Gala dude is very easy on the eyes. And apparently, he is one of 3 men that were given the boot for being too sexy. I wonder what the other 2 look like.

So ladies (and some gentlemen too), here's a lil friday eye candy for you:

Have a sexy good weekend folks.

Monday, April 22, 2013

What a great weekend it has been

I hope you all had as fabulous a weekend as i did.

Friday i went out and got my hair done for saturday. I went to my fav Dominican salon and instead of getting a relaxer, i got a blowout. I don't know how many (if any) of you ladies have ever gotten a Dominican blowout before but good lord. It is enough to make you wanna lay down your sword and shield, down by the riverside... cuz if hell is even half as horrific as the heat that woman applied to my poor scalp/hair, that'd be reason enough to turn your life over to a higher authority!

My hair was laid though lol.

Saturday i made the long ass drive to Gainesville for my dear friends, Shan and Tony's wedding. (I wrote about them before here). I could kick myself for not getting my ducks in a row sooner so i could have made it to the traditional wedding on friday but it is what it is. The white wedding was fabulous and the reception...woosh. Seriously, best wedding i've been too in forever. (No offense to the bajillion of other weddings i've been to recently lol). And it was seriously like a college reunion. So many people i haven't seen in YEARS. And when i tell you...we boogied until we just couldn't boogie no more lol. Which leads me to sunday...

I spent the ENTIRE DAY in my bed. Even as i type, my back, my shoulders, my thighs...all sore as hell. Not to mention that my blowout is just completely ruined. Clearly i'm gettin too old to boogie down like that lol. I actually slept from like 3am til like 1pm. In that time, I woke up once for like an hour and then turned back over and went back to sleep lol.

But at the end of the day, i had a marvelous time with marvelous people and have already been pestering the engaged ppl at the wedding when we were coming to chop jollof at their own lol.

Sidenote: My friend's date pulled me to the side at the end of the night and was like how i have such a wonderful spirit and he understands why people are so drawn to me and why i have such good people in my life. I would say aaaawww, but i think he was stupid-drunk lol. But they say a drunk man speaks a sober mind.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Sexy Legs

What are nice legs? Like, what's the criteria? What are the minimum requirements to be in the running for best legs? I have never understood it myself lol. I mean...legs are legs. Aside maybe from scrapes and scars and cellulite and varicose veins and size...they all seem pretty much the same to me.

I guess i'm just not a leg person.

These are some pics that came up when i types in sexy legs in my google image search bar:

Personally, i'm more impressed with the shoes and hosiery lol

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Life Lessons Learned in Atlanta

On my many trips to ATL, i have learned many things. Today's lesson:

Apparently nobody in Atlanta (or the surrounding suburbs) knows where the hell the Marta Civic Center Station is. Not even if you give them the specific address, the exit to get off of the highway at, or nearby landmarks. SMH.

I told my ride where to pick me up at. Gave the physical address, in addition to the name of the "station", the whole 9 yards. I arrived around 8pm. My ride didn't get there til about 10:30pm. 

It was so ridiculous. And to make matters infinitely worse, my phone had 1 was dark...there were bums and other unsavory characters galore, and it was cold. But you know me- Certified Gangster- i didn't cry i really wanted to tho.

The only redeeming aspect was that i was not the only person left stranded here, hence why i am of the belief that no one knows where this place is. I can't tell you how many of the people that i traveled with were still there even after i finally got picked up. We had formed an unspoken kinship. Literally walking up and down this strip of land hollering into our various cellular devices shouting a various volumes: "what do you mean you're lost?" "what is taking you so long to get here?" "how do you not know where it is?" "come on, son!"

Added to my own personal hell is the fact that the red line, the only train that takes you north of the perimeter, doesn't run after 7pm. So if my ride hadn't found me, i literally had no way of getting out of the city to their apartment. But like i said, i'm a G...i didn't cry lol. And eventually my ride showed up and i made it to my destination safe and sound (though i did have to pee really really bad and the car ride was another 30 minutes. I just barely made it).

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Men don't know shhhh about men

I've always suspected that men don't know shit about their brethren, particularly when it comes to romance/relationships. They think they do because...what reason does a man have to lie to their homeboys, right?


Men lie to their homeboys 10x more than they lie to women. Because men are obsessed with impressing their boys. Kinda ridiculous if you ask me. (kinda explains why so many man are ridiculously over-homophobic but thats neither here nor there) But there it is. I know a lot of people say that men do all the things they do (get a good job, nice car, nice house, jewelry, etc) in order to impress the ladies. But what they are really doing is putting themselves in a position to snare the baddest bitch they can so that they can go brag to their friends about the bad bitch they just pulled.

But that's not the point today.

The straw that broke the camel's back for this theory/postulate came to me fairly recently. I was conversing with a guy on some "so i know its real" tip and he said that the fact that he bought a chick's plane ticket to come and see him was proof that she was special to him.


How so, i asked.

Because dudes don't do that shit, and even if they did, it wouldn't be for just any old body, was his reply.

Really though sir? So you know i had to school him cuz clearly he is lost in the game:

1) All Most men do this (or have offered or attempted to do this). Where have you been? I ran outta fingers and toes counting the number of dudes that have "sent for me"over the years.  *ok i'm exaggerating...but only a little lol

2) Why wouldn't you pay for her ticket? I'm assuming given the circumstances that she is most likely crossing state lines with the unspoken primary or secondary intention of meeting your sexual needs wants. The least you could do was provide the transportation. (sounds like prostitution a lil but it is what it is)

3) Seriously, where have you been? This happens all the damn time, across the globe.

This is why i very rarely take relationship advice from men...that don't date men. Cuz what the hell do they know? At least a woman (or gay man) has a point of reference with their advice.

Disclaimer (i think im starting to turn into the female version of SNM with these disclaimers lol): Feel free not to take this seriously if you want.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Technology and other things

The other day i was waiting for a friend to call me back. After like 30 minutes i was starting to get impatient- then i got a text asking why i wasn't answering my phone. Um, because my phone didn't ring! The next message said: But i called you like 3 times and it rang a few times then went to voicemail. SMH.  I swear my phone has a mind of its own yo. The thing only works when it wants to. Lazy son-of-a-biscuit. That's not even the first time it has happened. Never mind that my phone rarely, if ever, even tells me i have a new voicemail message.

New text message?...naaaaaah, you don't need to read that.

Someone's calling?...naaaaaah, i'm not gonna ring and let you know

Got a new voicemail? don't need to know about that.

Scumbag cell phone!

Anywho, in other news. I hope everyone had a good weekend. My little brother went to his senior prom on Saturday and now i'm sitting here feeling like a vieja. My own senior prom was almost a decade ago. Where has the time gone?

Random: i don't understand why people get money and act a damn fool. Seriously, let me strike it rich, the last thing i'm gonna do is eff it up by driving drunk, causing fights, running people over, or being a crack head/dope fiend/coke head.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Por que no los dos?

Nobody writes letters anymore. Why is that? Well...i guess i know why. Instant gratification/conversation vs snail mail. Seems like a no-brainer. Why wait to 3+ days for someone to get your message when you can just as easily call/text/ping/whatsapp/skype/etc?

Well i for one miss the days of passing notes and writing letters...hell even an email would be appreciated. I don't know what it is but there's something a lot more personal or maybe meaningful (as counter-intuitive as that seems) about someone taking the time out to write you a letter. Talk less of the excitement over opening something in the mail that isn't a bill or solicitation.
apparently i have excellent credit because i get credit card offers by the boatload. If only they knew!
 So long story short...who wants to be Lady Ngo's pen pal??? lol

Am I with the right person?

Ya'll know i hate relationship advice things cuz 9 times out of 10 its malarkey but i saw this on the bookface and felt compelled to share

During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the right person?"

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind
replied the author.

Here's the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you
fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls,
want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet."Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you
may begin to desire that experience with someone
else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know
WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO! ♥

Your thoughts?

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Women Pt 2.5

All-Female musical collabos
(for some reason, i think i did a post like this before but i don't remember when or what it was called lol)

Friday, April 5, 2013

Where do we draw the line

There's a "thin line" between discipline and abuse. The black webiverse has been abuzz lately over that video of dude beating the shit out of his teen/pre-teen daughters for making a twerking video. I personally haven't seen it, nor do i have any desire to. But from what i hear, it was pretty gruesome. So much so that the man has been indicted for his actions. From what i've gathered, the two daughters were visiting their dad when the beating took place. When they returned to their mother's home and she noticed the bruises, welts, and open wounds left as souvenirs of the discipline, she called the police.

Of course, the house is divided on the issue. One side says "thats what their fast tails get", "he was only being a good dad", and the ever popular "if i had done that blah blah blah" aka "i got my ass beat and i turned out ok" epistles. Then you have the correct other side saying that he went way too far, what he did was more about anger/aggression than discipline, and he rightly is being made to face the legal ramifications of his actions.

I personally was  a pretty good kid. Getting a whooping happened very rarely, if ever. I honestly can only think of a couple of times that i got hit, aside from random smacks (never in the face of course) for being a smartass. But i've also seen my sister and my brother get their ass handed to them for doing shit they have no business. So i'm not one of those people who's against corporal punishment because i never got it/saw it. I just don't really buy into the idea that the only way to discipline a child is to beat them senseless. People take that spare the rod and spoil the child scripture way too literally/seriously. Sure, sometimes a spanking or a swat on the arm/leg/bottom is in order. But to pick up a cable cord and beat your child til they are bruised (or worse) is just too much to me. And it certainly is no guarantee that your kid will behave. I know plenty of people who've never been sent out to pick a switch (and it better be a good switch or the beating will just be worse cuz now your parent or whomever is even more pissed) that have turned out to be perfectly respectable and upstanding citizens. Likewise, i know people who's parents bust their ass on a regular basis that ain't doin shit  in life.

Discipline has always been a touchy subject. In essence most people feel "well who are you to tell me how to raise/discipline my kids". And to a certain extent, i understand where they are coming from. But come on. At some point the line has to be drawn between what constitutes discipline and what just shouldn't be acceptable. The question i pose is...where do we draw that line?

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Of mothers and sons

I have an issue with the sentiment that "it takes a man to raise a man". What exactly makes a man, a man? What are these magical qualities that turn boys into men that women apparently know nothing about?

If i should make babies, i personally strive to raise decent, upstanding human beings. To be frank, i honestly have no idea what type of life lessons i would need to teach my son that I wouldn't also, even if it needs to be tweeked a little, need to educate my daughter about. And vice versa.

Of all the things i've heard men say, both jokingly as well as seriously, about raising their sons, most of it doesn't amount to a hill of beans. Majority of it falls along the lines of the same old patriarchal, misogynistic bullshit that has pervaded our society thus far. 

While i have absolutely no desire to raise any child, male or female, by my lonesome...i'm struggling to understand what the male presence does that i, as a woman, cannot. 

So if anyone has answers, please feel free to voice them. Cuz this is a legit question.

Disclaimer: I am in no way downplaying the role a good father (or a good two parent home) can have on the upbringing of a child. I seriously just want to know the justification for this ideology that a woman is incapable of raising a man.

Subdisclaimer: in the interest of clarity, i'm not talking about lessons in regards to things that are biological/fundamental. i'm talking about life lessons that would make your son a good/better man, father, husband, human being.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Women pt. 2

Angela Davis:

Audre Lord:

Melissa Harris-Perry:

Maya Angelou:

Shirley Chisholm:

And Miss Sophia...i mean Oprah lol:

More than likely part 3 coming soon. I'm on a freakin roll.

Monday, April 1, 2013

Money or Love

Hola folks. Its been a million years it seems since last i got a blog award but here it is, courtesy of Gretel (Premonitions of the Past):

She only asked 1 question: money or love?

Me o, i have questions about this question. Is it that i can only have money or love for the rest of my life? Or is it which one i get first? Either way, i'm fairly certain my answer will be money. Or love from someone who has lots of money and does not mind sharing with me. Love will not put clothes on my back, food in my tummy, roof over my head, get the loan people off my back or any of those other things. So yes, money must be in the equation somehow.

Whats love anyway? Tina Turner said it's nothing but a second hand emotion. So maybe i don't need it. I think i can live with friendship, respect and some exclusive kisses, cuddles, and other stuff. *please note the exclusive i put there. the kisses, cuddles,  and other things can't be shared with anyone but me. non negotiable.*

My dear readers, you should know by now i don't follow rules. So there will be no asking of 50-eleven questions and nominating and all (as i'm sure i've done this award thing the proper way before anyhow). I'm just going to extend the question on to you:

Money or Love...and why?

You Just Never Know

Friday night i found out that a friend of mine passed away. We weren't really close or anything. To be honest, even if she hadn't passed, who even knows if i our paths would have even crossed again, what with her going back to Uganda and all. I met her when i first got to college and got kidnapped by my school's ASA. She was one of the first people who welcomed me with open arms (and no, there weren't that many people who's arms were open back then which is part of the reason why that's always the first thing i remember about her). Her name was Sarah and she was very sweet lady. Very soft-spoken, kind-hearted and just all around...wholesome. One of those people that when she comes around, you instantly take notice and want to go and say hello and give her a hug.

Though i am a bit of bleeding heart, i definitely wasn't expecting the wave of emotion that overcame me when i heard the news. The tears were flowing uncontrollably and even gave myself a headache from crying so. But at least i know she's no longer suffering and i'm sure she's in heaven kicking it with Jesus so i can't be down for too long.

RIP Dr. Sarah Namulondo. You will truly be missed.