Wednesday, May 25, 2011

one of the worst things you can do

is take advice from your friends!

Ok, ok. Maybe its not the worse thing you can do. But you gotta admit, taking your friends' advice isn't always the best idea. I remember when one of my sorority sister's got married, we were all sitting around at her bridal shower and towards the end of the evening, we went around the circle giving advice. When they got to me, my advice was- "don't listen to half the crap we're going to tell you" You can imagine how many side-eyes i got from that comment. My reasoning is not necessarily that your friends have bad intentions but that no one is walking in your moccasins and no one else has to live with the decisions you make. In this specific instance, all i can say is honestly- there's a reason why she was getting married and the rest of us are single lol. I'll be damned if im gonna take the advice of a single woman (especially if she has a sketchy relationship past) about fixing an issue in my marriage. And as a single person, the last thing i want to do is give someone advice about their husband/wife. Not only am i not walking in your shoes (or even similar shoes), I'm YOUR friend so by default i am going to be at least somewhat biased.

The reason i felt like writing about this is because I was reading a blog about romancing your man. I was reading it and something in me was asking...why are you reading this? Same thing i say to myself now about my Cosmo obsession lol. Anywho, so im reading this girl's post and it's like, why would i take advice about pleasing a man from a woman? Not to say what do you know about it, but honestly, what do you know about it??? LOL If I wanna know how to please my man, why wouldn't i ask a man for advice? Or better still, ask the man that im actually trying to please?!? Not to say that the stuff she said wasn't cute/interesting/etc but who's to say anyone likes what she's proposing (other than whomever she may have done it to)? Everyone is different and everyone has their own preferences.

So what's my point in all of this? Take the advice of others with a grain of salt. No one knows on this earth knows all (no matter how much they might pretend to). And even when there are no ill-intentions, things may not go the way

Disclaimer- I have nada against the good people at Max-Logic, just a simple difference of opinion. Also, your friends are a valuable asset and may offer good insight when you have a problem. But that still doesn't mean you should do everything that they tell you to.


  1. haha i love how u humbly added a disclaimer :p
    Yea i always take my friend's advice with a grain of salt. It doesn't even necessarily have to be about relationships, everything in general!,lol. Some of my friends are "serial advisers". They always have an opinion bout every damn thing and sometimes i jst tell them to SIT! I mean, it's easy to give advice when u aren't the one that has to take the advice, i should know that..i give advice to any one that cares to listen every damn time!,lol

  2. Love your disclaimer also
    I do appreciate people's advice....but it doesn't mean I will always take it.
    The truth is advice might be inappropriate because friends often don't reveal the whole story about their predicament.
    For example, a friend came to me for advice because her hubby was being unfaithful,abusive etc etc
    What she did not tell me was that she was already sleeping with her boss......mmmmm !

  3. @kitkat- i am so the advice giver/philosopher too lol. I try to restrict it to only people who ask though lol

    @Naijamum- very very true about people not always sharing the whole story.

  4. I think a lot of women are shy about asking their men what they want, which is sad if not selfish really. cause you end up doing what YOU think he wants or should want.

    Cosmo! Cosmo! my romance with her is so overrrr..


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